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The Ramen Rater’s Bottom Ten Instant Noodles Of All Time 2019 Edition

It’s that time again – time to run down the worst varieties I’ve ever had. That’s no small task either – this list is current as of review #3180. These are the ten worst ones, in my opinion, leaving a lasting negative impression on my taste buds. With that, I again give you what you want.

The Ramen Rater’s Bottom Ten Instant Noodles Of All Time 2019 Edition

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Watch me run through The Ramen Rater’s Bottom Ten Instant Noodles Of All Time 2019 Edition.

The Ramen Rater’s Bottom Ten Instant Noodles Of All Time 2019 Edition

#10 – Master Kong Artificial Abalone Crab Flavor Instant Noodle – China

Definitely a knock-off of sorts. Although I see these as Master Kong/Kang Shi Fu often, they most definitely aren’t. Moreover, the broth has an absolutely foul taste to it. I’m sure it’s safe to eat, but I would never want to cross paths with this one again. Original review

#9 – Koyo Reduced Sodium Garlic & Pepper Ramen – United States

The noodles are thick – more like ramyun. They have an alright chew; although they seem almost doughy- and not Hakata style ramen noodle doughy. The broth does taste of garlic and pepper, but it’s so very bland. It really is like you could boil some pepper and a clove of garlic and achieve the same results. Not at all to my liking. Original review

#8 – Urban Noodle Authentic Street Food Black Bean – United Kingdom

The noodles in this one were flat instead of round. They came out very nicely. The flavoring however was just strange. I expected maybe something of a Korean-Chinese fusion dish, but those are hearty and rich and not savory and sweet. In fact, this one was a little too sweet for me. The thinly sliced bamboo shoots don’t work for me either; leaving them whole would be nicer I think. What’s more, it has a kind of chemically aftertaste; like chlorine or soap. Original review

#7 – One Dish Asia Japanese Ramen Noodle – United States

This one comes with a fresh noodle pouch. They didn’t have a very fresh texture; more mushy. The bamboo shoots (which more resembled overcooked carrot and I had to consult the ingredients to figure what they were) were mushy as well. The broth had an acidic and a flavor reminiscent of the teriyaki flavor I’ve encountered in bad teriyaki instant flavors. A hot mess. Original review

#6 – Acecook Super Cup Pringles Sour Cream & Onion Yakisoba – Japan

The Ramen Rater's Bottom Ten Instant Noodles Of All Time 2019 Edition

I love yakisoba and Japan offers many different versions. This one however gets no love from me. This viral monstrosity might be neat to look at but for me it stopped there. Imagine taking a butter knife and scraping off the powder from every chips in a tube of sour cream and onion chips. Then sprinkle over noodles. Just gross – I think these two products should never come together. Original review

#5 – Isoyama Shoji 18 Prohibited / Restricted / Only La-Men Curry Taste – Japan

First, this is a lot of food. There’s reason for the warning on this pack. 700cc water and a few minutes cooking brings you a huge bowl of noodles. While in general that’s not a complaint, the flavor is. It’s violently spicy for starters. It does have a curry flavor, which at first glance is great. Then you have to taste it. You’d think all that water would dilute the sachet that comes with it but no dice here. Too much flavor and heat are the theme here, and it’s a bitter song to swallow. Original review

#4 – Baijia Single Noble Black Bone Chicken Flavor Instant Sweet Potato Noodles – China

I was told by a guy from the company that this indeed was believed to be medicinal and helpful to women having their ‘time of the month.’ I’ve also been told by a reader that people generally don’t like black bone chicken soup even in China. Very slimy sweet potato noodles, thick, greasy broth and horrid veggies that didn’t hydrate well was just a flavor, texture, and complete food hole nightmare for me. This was just horrible stuff that I couldn’t stand. Original review

#3 – Maruchan Bariuma Goboten Udon – Japan

Do you like earthy things? Like dirt? Maybe throw a ton of salt on it – does that do the trick for you? This one has just huge amount of burdock root. Burdock is great in small amounts, but this much just turns this variety into a bowl of something that just screams salty dirt. A full frontal assault on the taste buds that leaves me wondering if when they made this if they tasted it. Original review

#2 – Dr. McDougall’s Vegan Pad Thai Noodle Soup – United States

The Ramen Rater's Bottom Ten Instant Noodles Of All Time 2019 Edition

Where do I begin. Well first off, when one in the United States thinks of Pad Thai, they think of what they might find at a Thai restaurant. Okay so the rice noodles came out nicely – short, flat and broad and well hydrated, but they’re short and cut like egg noodles.. Now for the broth. Thin. Nothing like pad thai. Has a little lime flavor and a kind of herbal taste. The floating bits of tofu are a lot like the marshmallows you get in the hot chocolate that comes with marshmallows. This is as far from pad thai as I can even express in words. It’s like someone gave a broken description of pad thai to someone who has short term memory problems and no taste buds a week prior and told them to make it. I kind of feel personally violated and offended. Never thought this would slip to 2nd on this list.. Original review

#1 – Simply Asia Singapore Street Noodles Classic Curry – United States

A nice looking package with the enticing words of ‘classic curry’ brings an image of something really special. This isn’t the case though. Rice noodles come out very mushy, but curry with sligtly soggy noodles wouldn’t be so bad if it tasted like curry. Basically the flavor is a lot of lemongrass and strongly lacks authenticity. It’s like if you went to a restaurant, ordered some french fries, and they brought you a soda that said french fries on it. Just wrong on so many levels. Offensive in the highest. Original review

 

The Ramen Rater’s Bottom Ten Instant Noodles Of All Time 2017 Edition

The Ramen Rater's Bottom Ten Instant Noodles Of All Time 2017 Edition

So today it’s the fifth annual The Ramen Rater’s Bottom Ten Instant Noodles Of All Time. On my other lists, I exclude varieties that no longer are on the market. On this list, everything’s fair game for the bottom ten. As I say in the video presentation, if you like some of these, there’s nothing wrong with you – I just find these detestable personally. These are my least favorite varieties of the over 2400 varieties posted to date. Without gurther ado, the bottom ten.

The Ramen Rater’s Bottom Ten Instant Noodles Of All Time 2017 Edition

The full list video!

#10: Roland Ramen Japanese Style Quick-Cooking Alimentary Paste With Chicken Artificially Flavored Soup Base – United States

The Ramen Rater's Bottom Ten Instant Noodles Of All Time 2017 Edition

Honestly, I expected this to be a kind of ‘run-of-the-mill’ variety. I review based on the base product as well as the provided cooking directions. Well, they call for 3 cups of water and they’re violently bland. In the nutrition facts, they mention that this pack contains 3 servings! I’m guessing this is so they can say the sodium level is low? I’m unsure. What I’m sure of is that I really disliked these. Original review

#9 – Sichuan Guangyou Sweet Potato Instant Noodle Braised Spicy Chitterling Flavor – China

The Ramen Rater's Bottom Ten Instant Noodles Of All Time 2017 Edition

The sweet potato thread was alright, but very gloppy. The flavor was kind of brutal; indeed, too strong for me. I think the soup direction might have been better. What’s more, the powder sachet contents didn’t work well as the peas didn’t hydrate whatsoever. Original review

#8 – Maruchan Spicy Tomato Salsa Ramen – Japan

The Ramen Rater's Bottom Ten Instant Noodles Of All Time 2017 Edition

The noodles hydrated very nicely and have a standard flatness and thin character. The flavor was unfortunately something of a departure. It was a kind of spicy and putrid tomato melange – like homemade salsa left out overnight from binge drinking with a crew of chainsmokers – which just tastes like pure trainwreck. The bits of potato were interesting and hydrated well enough though – kind of liked that they had potato skins on. But yeah – this was just a fusion that should come undone. Original review

#7: Vedan Wei Wei A Instant Noodles Chicken Flavor – Taiwan

The Ramen Rater's Bottom Ten Instant Noodles Of All Time 2017 Edition

The noodles were very ho-hum. While they hydrated well, they seemed like they just didn’t belong in the ‘food’ group; spongy and riddled with sadness. As for chicken flavor, that was definitely absent. I was really happy about the vegetables, but they were mushy. Original review

#6 – Master Kong Artificial Abalone Crab Flavor Instant Noodle – China

The Ramen Rater's Bottom Ten Instant Noodles Of All Time 2017 Edition

The noodles were alright – plentiful too. Nothing to write home about. What is to write home about is the flavor. Write a warning letter home! I mean this was just plain funky; seemed initially like a crab stick kind of scent and essence but it just turned into this not food kind of taste that I just couldn’t stomach whatsoever. Couldn’t pour this down the drain fast enough. Original review

#5 – Koyo Reduced Sodium Garlic & Pepper Ramen – United States

The Ramen Rater's Bottom Ten Instant Noodles Of All Time 2017 Edition

The noodles are thick – more like ramyun. They have an alright chew; although they seem almost doughy- and not Hakata style ramen noodle doughy. The broth does taste of garlic and pepper, but it’s so very bland. It really is like you could boil some pepper and a clove of garlic and achieve the same results. Not at all to my liking. Original review

#4 – Urban Noodle Authentic Street Food Black Bean – United Kingdom

The Ramen Rater's Bottom Ten Instant Noodles Of All Time 2017 Edition

The noodles in this one were flat instead of round. They came out very nicely. The flavoring however was just strange. I expected maybe something of a Korean-Chinese fusion dish, but those are hearty and rich and not savory and sweet. In fact, this one was a little too sweet for me. The thinly sliced bamboo shoots don’t work for me either; leaving them whole would be nicer I think. What’s more, it has a kind of chemically aftertaste; like chlorine or soap. Original review

#3 – One Dish Asia Japanese Ramen Noodle – United States

The Ramen Rater's Bottom Ten Instant Noodles Of All Time 2017 Edition

This one comes with a fresh noodle pouch. They didn’t have a very fresh texture; more mushy. The bamboo shoots (which more resembled overcooked carrot and I had to consult the ingredients to figure what they were) were mushy as well. The broth had an acidic and a flavor reminiscent of the teriyaki flavor I’ve encountered in bad teriyaki instant flavors. A hot mess. Original review here

#2 – Baijia Single Noble Black Bone Chicken Flavor Instant Sweet Potato Noodles – China

The Ramen Rater's Bottom Ten Instant Noodles Of All Time 2017 Edition

I was told by a guy from the company that this indeed was believed to be medicinal and helpful to women having their ‘time of the month.’ I’m also been told by a reader that people generally don’t like black bone chicken soup even in China. Very slimy sweet potato noodles, thick, greasy broth and horrid veggies that didn’t hydrate well was just a flavor, texture, and complete food hole nightmare for me. This was just horrible stuff that I couldn’t stand. Original review

#1 – Dr. McDougall’s Vegan Pad Thai Noodle Soup – United States

Bottom Ten Instant Noodles Of All Time 2017 Edition

Wow – where do it begin. Well, first off when one in the United States thinks of Pad Thai, they think of what they might find at a domestic Thai restaurant. Okay so the rice noodles came out nicely – short, flat and broad and well hydrated. Now for the broth. Thin. Nothing like pad thai. Has a little lime taste and a kind of herbed taste. The floating bits of tofu are a lot like the marshmallows you get in the hot chocolate that comes with marshmallows. This is as far from pad thai as I can even express in words. It’s like someone gave a broken description of pad thai to someone who has short term memory problems and no taste buds a week prior and told them to make it. I kind of feel personally violated and offended. A new #1 on the Bottom Ten. Original review

#2426: Dr. McDougall’s Vegan Pad Thai Noodle Soup

#2426: Dr. McDougall's Vegan Pad Thai Noodle Soup - United States - The Ramen Rater

Well it’s been quite a while since I’ve reviewed anything by Dr. McDougall’s. Why? Well, the first one I tried was a disappointment. I saw this one recently and thought maybe I should give them another chance. I am not expecting this will be one I like very much though; the two lines in large print immediately contradict eachother: ‘Pad Thai’ and ‘Noodle Soup.’ This just sounds wrong. But hey – maybe this is really good stuff. Let’s give it a look.

#2426: Dr. McDougall's Vegan Pad Thai Noodle Soup - United States - The Ramen Rater

Detail of the side panels (click to enlarge). Says it is Vegan friendly but check for yourself. To prepare, add room temperature water to fill line and stir. Microwave for 1 1/2 minutes. Cover and let steep 5 minutes. Stir and enjoy!

#2426: Dr. McDougall's Vegan Pad Thai Noodle Soup - United States - The Ramen Rater

Detail of the lid (click to enlarge).

#2426: Dr. McDougall's Vegan Pad Thai Noodle Soup - United States - The Ramen Rater

Here are the uncooked rice noodles. Short and wide.

#2426: Dr. McDougall's Vegan Pad Thai Noodle Soup - United States - The Ramen Rater

In with the noodles are bits of vegetable and dehydrated tofu.

#2426: Dr. McDougall's Vegan Pad Thai Noodle Soup - United States - The Ramen Rater

A seasoning sachet.

#2426: Dr. McDougall's Vegan Pad Thai Noodle Soup - United States - The Ramen Rater

A very fine powder with flecks and a shade that is reminiscent of Pad Thai.

#2426: Dr. McDougall's Vegan Pad Thai Noodle Soup - United States - The Ramen Rater

Finished (click to enlarge). Ladies and Gentlemen, pad thai noodle soup. This is… Okay so the rice noodles came out nicely – short, flat and broad and well hydrated. Now for the broth. Thin. Nothing like pad thai. Has a little lime taste and a kind of herbed taste. The floating bits of tofu are a lot like the marshmallows you get in the hot chocolate that comes with marshmallows. This is as far from pad thai as I can even express in words. It’s like someone gave a broken description of pad thai to someone who has short term memory problems and no taste buds a week prior and told them to make it. I kind of feel violated. 0.0 out of 5.0 stars. Saddened and offended. UPC bar code 767335011070.

Dr. McDougall’s Right Foods V e g a n Pad Thai Noodle Soup, Fresh Flavor, 2-Ounce Cups (Pack of 6)

A unique recipe for Vegan Pad Thai you can try at home!

#946: Dr. McDougall’s Right Foods Vegan Chicken Ramen

 

I’ve often wondered if I would ever find this one. I’ve seen i mentioned quite a few times, and finally the other day I found it at a local grocery store. Vegan… Organic… Let’s give it a try.

The side panels (click image to enlarge). Very few ingredients. Also very low in fat.

This is a very small noodle block.

A pretty big seasoning packet.

Has an odd flavor to it – doesn’t make me think of chicken.

Looks like a nice little assortment of veggies.

Finished (click image to enlarge). Added kizami shoga (pickled gonger), stir fry vegetables and some Urashima Sesame & Salt furikake. The noodles are okay – a little low on backbone. The broth is very strange to me. It reminds me of the smell of cooking broccoli but the taste. I don’t know if that’s logical, but it tastes really off to me and nothing like chicken. The vegetable hydrated nicely. If you are vegan and looking for instant noodles that taste like chicken, I wouldn’t say this is where its at, but I don’t know of many other choices. I would say this is more of a vegetable flavor and less of a chicken flavor. Didn’t find it exceptionally good. 1.75 out of 5.0 stars. Turns out they make a Miso flavor noodle cup as well as a hot and sour. Perhaps those will fare better if I ever see them. UPC bar code 767335011179 – get it here.

I expected to find more on YouTube asbout this one, but here’s a guy who does weekly grocery product reviews and has a little spiel about another Dr. McDougall’s product.

Some people like to use Shirataki noodles as they have literally nothing to them. Check out this recipe.