Tag Archives: bottom ten instant noodles

The Ramen Rater’s Bottom Ten Instant Noodles Of All Time 2019 Edition

It’s that time again – time to run down the worst varieties I’ve ever had. That’s no small task either – this list is current as of review #3180. These are the ten worst ones, in my opinion, leaving a lasting negative impression on my taste buds. With that, I again give you what you want.

The Ramen Rater’s Bottom Ten Instant Noodles Of All Time 2019 Edition

Video Presentation

Watch me run through The Ramen Rater’s Bottom Ten Instant Noodles Of All Time 2019 Edition.

The Ramen Rater’s Bottom Ten Instant Noodles Of All Time 2019 Edition

#10 – Master Kong Artificial Abalone Crab Flavor Instant Noodle – China

Definitely a knock-off of sorts. Although I see these as Master Kong/Kang Shi Fu often, they most definitely aren’t. Moreover, the broth has an absolutely foul taste to it. I’m sure it’s safe to eat, but I would never want to cross paths with this one again. Original review

#9 – Koyo Reduced Sodium Garlic & Pepper Ramen – United States

The noodles are thick – more like ramyun. They have an alright chew; although they seem almost doughy- and not Hakata style ramen noodle doughy. The broth does taste of garlic and pepper, but it’s so very bland. It really is like you could boil some pepper and a clove of garlic and achieve the same results. Not at all to my liking. Original review

#8 – Urban Noodle Authentic Street Food Black Bean – United Kingdom

The noodles in this one were flat instead of round. They came out very nicely. The flavoring however was just strange. I expected maybe something of a Korean-Chinese fusion dish, but those are hearty and rich and not savory and sweet. In fact, this one was a little too sweet for me. The thinly sliced bamboo shoots don’t work for me either; leaving them whole would be nicer I think. What’s more, it has a kind of chemically aftertaste; like chlorine or soap. Original review

#7 – One Dish Asia Japanese Ramen Noodle – United States

This one comes with a fresh noodle pouch. They didn’t have a very fresh texture; more mushy. The bamboo shoots (which more resembled overcooked carrot and I had to consult the ingredients to figure what they were) were mushy as well. The broth had an acidic and a flavor reminiscent of the teriyaki flavor I’ve encountered in bad teriyaki instant flavors. A hot mess. Original review

#6 – Acecook Super Cup Pringles Sour Cream & Onion Yakisoba – Japan

The Ramen Rater's Bottom Ten Instant Noodles Of All Time 2019 Edition

I love yakisoba and Japan offers many different versions. This one however gets no love from me. This viral monstrosity might be neat to look at but for me it stopped there. Imagine taking a butter knife and scraping off the powder from every chips in a tube of sour cream and onion chips. Then sprinkle over noodles. Just gross – I think these two products should never come together. Original review

#5 – Isoyama Shoji 18 Prohibited / Restricted / Only La-Men Curry Taste – Japan

First, this is a lot of food. There’s reason for the warning on this pack. 700cc water and a few minutes cooking brings you a huge bowl of noodles. While in general that’s not a complaint, the flavor is. It’s violently spicy for starters. It does have a curry flavor, which at first glance is great. Then you have to taste it. You’d think all that water would dilute the sachet that comes with it but no dice here. Too much flavor and heat are the theme here, and it’s a bitter song to swallow. Original review

#4 – Baijia Single Noble Black Bone Chicken Flavor Instant Sweet Potato Noodles – China

I was told by a guy from the company that this indeed was believed to be medicinal and helpful to women having their ‘time of the month.’ I’ve also been told by a reader that people generally don’t like black bone chicken soup even in China. Very slimy sweet potato noodles, thick, greasy broth and horrid veggies that didn’t hydrate well was just a flavor, texture, and complete food hole nightmare for me. This was just horrible stuff that I couldn’t stand. Original review

#3 – Maruchan Bariuma Goboten Udon – Japan

Do you like earthy things? Like dirt? Maybe throw a ton of salt on it – does that do the trick for you? This one has just huge amount of burdock root. Burdock is great in small amounts, but this much just turns this variety into a bowl of something that just screams salty dirt. A full frontal assault on the taste buds that leaves me wondering if when they made this if they tasted it. Original review

#2 – Dr. McDougall’s Vegan Pad Thai Noodle Soup – United States

The Ramen Rater's Bottom Ten Instant Noodles Of All Time 2019 Edition

Where do I begin. Well first off, when one in the United States thinks of Pad Thai, they think of what they might find at a Thai restaurant. Okay so the rice noodles came out nicely – short, flat and broad and well hydrated, but they’re short and cut like egg noodles.. Now for the broth. Thin. Nothing like pad thai. Has a little lime flavor and a kind of herbal taste. The floating bits of tofu are a lot like the marshmallows you get in the hot chocolate that comes with marshmallows. This is as far from pad thai as I can even express in words. It’s like someone gave a broken description of pad thai to someone who has short term memory problems and no taste buds a week prior and told them to make it. I kind of feel personally violated and offended. Never thought this would slip to 2nd on this list.. Original review

#1 – Simply Asia Singapore Street Noodles Classic Curry – United States

A nice looking package with the enticing words of ‘classic curry’ brings an image of something really special. This isn’t the case though. Rice noodles come out very mushy, but curry with sligtly soggy noodles wouldn’t be so bad if it tasted like curry. Basically the flavor is a lot of lemongrass and strongly lacks authenticity. It’s like if you went to a restaurant, ordered some french fries, and they brought you a soda that said french fries on it. Just wrong on so many levels. Offensive in the highest. Original review

 

BOTTOM TEN 2018

Well, it’s that time again! Every year, I come out with an update to my Bottom Ten list. I’ve got a lot of top ten lists of course, but only one that’s comprised of my least favorite varieties. Many of these will be enjoyed by people – and that’s fine. Just most definitely not by me. Let’s take a look!

The Ramen Rater’s Bottom Ten Instant Noodles Of All Time 2018 Edition

Video Presentation

A video presentation of the list in its entirety.

The Ramen Rater’s Bottom Ten Instant Noodles Of All Time 2018 Edition

#10 – Mr. Noodles Pho Noodle Soup Simulated Beef Flavour – Canada

worst instant noodles bottom ten the ramen rater

A rough go. The noodles were just wrong; they might look like noodles, but they just didn’t hydrate very well and the chew was pure funky. The broth was about as bland as can be – maybe less water? Everything I review is according to what they put on the packaging and well, this just came out horribly. Original review

#9 – Vedan Wei Wei A Instant Noodles Chicken Flavor – Taiwan

worst instant noodles bottom ten the ramen rater

I’m a little confused by this one. Honestly, I believe the instructions on this bowl must be wrong and that it should be a dry noodle with a broth on the side. But it just goes to show that unless you put the correct directions on the bowl, you’re going to end up with something awry. TRhe other possibility is that the instructions are correct and that it’s still just completely horrible. Chicken flavor? I don’t think so. Noodles? Ultra spongy. No. Original review

#8 – Master Kong Artificial Abalone Crab Flavor Instant Noodle – China

worst instant noodles bottom ten the ramen rater

Definitely a knock-off of sorts. Although I see these as Master Kong/Kang Shi Fu often, they most definitely aren’t. Moreover, the broth has an absolutely foul taste to it. I’m sure it’s safe to eat, but I would never want to cross paths with this one again. Original review

#7 – Koyo Reduced Sodium Garlic & Pepper Ramen – United States

worst instant noodles bottom ten the ramen rater

The noodles are thick – more like ramyun. They have an alright chew; although they seem almost doughy- and not Hakata style ramen noodle doughy. The broth does taste of garlic and pepper, but it’s so very bland. It really is like you could boil some pepper and a clove of garlic and achieve the same results. Not at all to my liking. Original review

#6 – Urban Noodle Authentic Street Food Black Bean – United Kingdom

worst instant noodles bottom ten the ramen rater

The noodles in this one were flat instead of round. They came out very nicely. The flavoring however was just strange. I expected maybe something of a Korean-Chinese fusion dish, but those are hearty and rich and not savory and sweet. In fact, this one was a little too sweet for me. The thinly sliced bamboo shoots don’t work for me either; leaving them whole would be nicer I think. What’s more, it has a kind of chemically aftertaste; like chlorine or soap. Original review

#3 – One Dish Asia Japanese Ramen Noodle – United States

worst instant noodles bottom ten the ramen rater

This one comes with a fresh noodle pouch. They didn’t have a very fresh texture; more mushy. The bamboo shoots (which more resembled overcooked carrot and I had to consult the ingredients to figure what they were) were mushy as well. The broth had an acidic and a flavor reminiscent of the teriyaki flavor I’ve encountered in bad teriyaki instant flavors. A hot mess. Original review

#4 – Isoyama Shoji 18 Prohibited / Restricted / Only La-Men Curry Taste – Japan

worst instant noodles bottom ten the ramen rater

First, this is a lot of food. There’s reason for the warning on this pack. 700cc water and a few minutes cooking brings you a huge bowl of noodles. While in general that’s not a complaint, the flavor is. It’s violently spicy for starters. It does have a curry flavor, which at first glance is great. Then you have to taste it. You’d think all that water would dilute the sachet that comes with it but no dice here. Too much flavor and heat are the theme here, and it’s a bitter song to swallow. Original review

#3 – Baijia Single Noble Black Bone Chicken Flavor Instant Sweet Potato Noodles – China

worst instant noodles bottom ten the ramen rater

I was told by a guy from the company that this indeed was believed to be medicinal and helpful to women having their ‘time of the month.’ I’ve also been told by a reader that people generally don’t like black bone chicken soup even in China. Very slimy sweet potato noodles, thick, greasy broth and horrid veggies that didn’t hydrate well was just a flavor, texture, and complete food hole nightmare for me. This was just horrible stuff that I couldn’t stand. Original review

#2 – Maruchan Bariuma Goboten Udon – Japan

worst instant noodles bottom ten the ramen rater

Do you like earthy things? Like dirt? Maybe throw a ton of salt on it – does that do the trick for you? This one has just huge amount of burdock root. Burdock is great in small amounts, but this much just turns this variety into a bowl of something that just screams salty dirt. A full frontal assault on the taste buds that leaves me wondering if when they made this if they tasted it. Original review

#1 – Dr. McDougall’s Vegan Pad Thai Noodle Soup – United States

worst instant noodles bottom ten the ramen rater

Wow – where do it begin. Well, first off when one in the United States thinks of Pad Thai, they think of what they might find at a domestic Thai restaurant. Okay so the rice noodles came out nicely – short, flat and broad and well hydrated. Now for the broth. Thin. Nothing like pad thai. Has a little lime taste and a kind of herbed taste. The floating bits of tofu are a lot like the marshmallows you get in the hot chocolate that comes with marshmallows. This is as far from pad thai as I can even express in words. It’s like someone gave a broken description of pad thai to someone who has short term memory problems and no taste buds a week prior and told them to make it. I kind of feel personally violated and offended. A new #1 on the Bottom Ten. Original review

The Ramen Rater’s Bottom Ten Instant Noodles Of All Time 2014 Edition

Another year, another list. With a range of zero to five stars, there are some that, well… Do quite poorly. These are my least favorite varieties I’ve ever tried – and I’ve 1,419 at the time of this posting. That’s a lot of instant noodles. Here they are, in all of their non-glory, the Bottom Ten Instant Noodles Of All Time 2014 Edition.

#10: Tesco    Everyday Value Chicken & Mushroom Flavour – United Kingdom

Where do I begin. Imagine oatmeal. Now, don’t imagine maple or cinnamon or anything resembling flavor. This was truly one of the blandest instant noodles I’ve ever experienced; when your instant noodles beg for some salt, something’s amiss. Original review here

#9: Mr. Noodles Chicken Kimchi Oriental Style Noodles With Soup Base – Canada

This was one where the name is truly misleading. First, the noodles are crumbly, then the broth has this strange flavor. It’s vaguely like chicken and somewhat like kimchi – but really not. I don’t know what they were thinking, or if they were thinking when they concocted this. Original review here

#8: Noodle Time Spicy Thai Instant Ramen Noodles With Real Vegetables – Canada

A prime example of noodle I dislike: watery broth, exceedingly mushy and spongy noodles and veggies that were lackluster and of the most minimal quantity and quality. Original review here

#7: Nan Jie Cun Hot-Dry Instant Noodles Chilli Flavour – China

I had such high hopes for this one. These noodles are made in the last true Communist city in China. There’s no money! You work, you go to the store and get what you need, you go home. Fascinating. These were just plain gross; I dunno – maybe I just don’t like monotone flavors. The ingredients were good, just all came together as a pile of yuck. Original preview here

#6: Nan Hsing Vegetarian Rice Noodles – Taiwan

The noodles were akin to cobwebs – not the ones spiders make, but the fake ones you get for Halloween. The veggies didn’t hydrate well at all, and the broth wasn’t much. Couldn’t eat it. Original review here

#5: Paldo Green Tea Chlorella Noodles – South Korea

While this company makes some noodles I really enjoy, they also make this one which I deplore. It’s just got such a funky flavor to it and a smell I can’t take. Original review here

#4: Fu Chang Chinese Noodle Company Pork, Seafood & Noodles Combo – United States

The noodles in this one were really mushy, and while it had a retort pouch with meat and seafood, it was really nasty. Original review here

#3: Campbell’s Hearty Noodles Thai Flavour – Canada

I really expected this one to be pretty good – I like their soups. The noodles are downright thick and chewy – in a bad way. The broth had a lemongrass coconut scent, but the flavor was all wrong. This was one that made me think the designers got partway through making it and then saw a shiny object and decided to examine that instead. Original review here

#2: Baijia Instant Sweet Potato Noodle Spicy Fei-Chang Flavor – China

A strong ‘dirt and urine’ scent accompanied by slimy sweet potato noodles. As it turns out, Fei Chang relates to fried pork intestines. Original review here

#1: Baijia Single Noble Black Bone Chicken Flavor Instant Sweet Potato Noodles – China

Here is my least favorite variety of all. Slimy sweet potato noodles, thick, greasy broth and horrid veggies that didn’t hydrate well. Original review here

The Ramen Rater’s Bottom Ten Instant Noodles Of All Time

So after sampling so many varieties of instant noodles over the years, of course there have been some that I didn’t like. There also were some that are so memorable for how awful they were. After people asked what my least favorites were a few times, I thought I should just make a list of them. I should point out that these are on the list because I couldn’t stand them. I’m pretty sure they are all still in production, and the only reason they would be is that people somewhere find them enjoyable. So who knows – you might have a completely different opinion on these than me, but I found them to be absolutely the worst of the worst. With that, here’s The Bottom Ten Instant Noodles Of All Time, 2013 Edition.

#10: Wei Lih Instant Noodles With Artificial Beef Flavored Soup Stock – Taiwan

2013_7_8_b10_010

I’ve had issues with broth being too salty before, but the lack of flavor in this one wasn’t tolerable. The flavor had a very ‘fake beef’ taste to it which was not at all enjoyable. Original post here

#9: GreeNoodle Miso Made With Moroheiya – Thailand

The noodles had a flavor I found to be akin to dirt – very strange. In the original review, I comment that the broth was ‘nightmarish.’ Original review here

#8: Fashion Food Oriental Flavor Instant Noodles – Thailand

These noodles came in a nice little plastic bowl with lid, As cool as that is, it didn’t make up for some seriously funky noodles and vile broth and veggies. Original review here

#7: Baijia Hot & Sour Flavor Instant Rice Noodle – China

The broth was of a deep crimson color. While interesting to look at, the slimy noodles and overly greasy broth with odd bits floating around were a turn-off trifecta. I couldn’t finish this bowl. Original review here

#6: Noodle Time Spicy Thai Instant Ramen Noodles With Real Vegetables – Canada

A prime example of noodle I dislike: watery broth, exceedingly mushy and spongy noodles and veggies that were lackluster and of the most minimal quantity and quality. Original review here

#5: Nan Hsing Vegetarian Rice Noodles – Taiwan

The noodles were akin to cobwebs – not the ones spiders make, but the fake ones you get for Halloween. The veggies didn’t hydrate well at all, and the broth wasn’t much. Couldn’t eat it. Original review here

#4: Paldo Green Tea Chlorella Noodles – South Korea

While this company makes some noodles I really enjoy, they also make this one which I deplore. It’s just got such a funky flavor to it and a smell I can’t take. Original review here

#3: Fu Chang Chinese Noodle Company Pork, Seafood & Noodles Combo – United States

The noodles in this one were really mushy, and while it had a retort pouch with meat and seafood, it was really nasty. Original review here

#2: Baijia Instant Sweet Potato Noodle Spicy Fei-Chang Flavor – China

A strong ‘dirt and urine’ scent accompanied by slimy sweet potato noodles. As it turns out, Fei Chang relates to fried pork intestines. Original review here

#1: Baijia Single Noble Black Bone Chicken Flavor Instant Sweet Potato Noodles – China

Here is my least favorite variety of all. Slimy sweet potato noodles, thick, greasy broth and horrid veggies that didn’t hydrate well. Original review here