Category Archives: GreeNoodle

The Ramen Rater’s Bottom Ten Instant Noodles Of All Time

So after sampling so many varieties of instant noodles over the years, of course there have been some that I didn’t like. There also were some that are so memorable for how awful they were. After people asked what my least favorites were a few times, I thought I should just make a list of them. I should point out that these are on the list because I couldn’t stand them. I’m pretty sure they are all still in production, and the only reason they would be is that people somewhere find them enjoyable. So who knows – you might have a completely different opinion on these than me, but I found them to be absolutely the worst of the worst. With that, here’s The Bottom Ten Instant Noodles Of All Time, 2013 Edition.

#10: Wei Lih Instant Noodles With Artificial Beef Flavored Soup Stock – Taiwan

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I’ve had issues with broth being too salty before, but the lack of flavor in this one wasn’t tolerable. The flavor had a very ‘fake beef’ taste to it which was not at all enjoyable. Original post here

#9: GreeNoodle Miso Made With Moroheiya – Thailand

The noodles had a flavor I found to be akin to dirt – very strange. In the original review, I comment that the broth was ‘nightmarish.’ Original review here

#8: Fashion Food Oriental Flavor Instant Noodles – Thailand

These noodles came in a nice little plastic bowl with lid, As cool as that is, it didn’t make up for some seriously funky noodles and vile broth and veggies. Original review here

#7: Baijia Hot & Sour Flavor Instant Rice Noodle – China

The broth was of a deep crimson color. While interesting to look at, the slimy noodles and overly greasy broth with odd bits floating around were a turn-off trifecta. I couldn’t finish this bowl. Original review here

#6: Noodle Time Spicy Thai Instant Ramen Noodles With Real Vegetables – Canada

A prime example of noodle I dislike: watery broth, exceedingly mushy and spongy noodles and veggies that were lackluster and of the most minimal quantity and quality. Original review here

#5: Nan Hsing Vegetarian Rice Noodles – Taiwan

The noodles were akin to cobwebs – not the ones spiders make, but the fake ones you get for Halloween. The veggies didn’t hydrate well at all, and the broth wasn’t much. Couldn’t eat it. Original review here

#4: Paldo Green Tea Chlorella Noodles – South Korea

While this company makes some noodles I really enjoy, they also make this one which I deplore. It’s just got such a funky flavor to it and a smell I can’t take. Original review here

#3: Fu Chang Chinese Noodle Company Pork, Seafood & Noodles Combo – United States

The noodles in this one were really mushy, and while it had a retort pouch with meat and seafood, it was really nasty. Original review here

#2: Baijia Instant Sweet Potato Noodle Spicy Fei-Chang Flavor – China

A strong ‘dirt and urine’ scent accompanied by slimy sweet potato noodles. As it turns out, Fei Chang relates to fried pork intestines. Original review here

#1: Baijia Single Noble Black Bone Chicken Flavor Instant Sweet Potato Noodles – China

Here is my least favorite variety of all. Slimy sweet potato noodles, thick, greasy broth and horrid veggies that didn’t hydrate well. Original review here

#790: GreeNoodle Shiitake and Soy Sauce

Aha the GreeNoodle. I will be the first to admit that I think I’ve only liked one of these that I’ve reviewed. This one’s mushroom too, a flavor I rarely care for. But I’m really hoping I like this one.

The back of the package (click image to enlarge). I should also say that the Vulcan Science Ministry has found no evidence that time travel is possible.

Yes. They’re green!

The powdered seasoning packet.

I am not a big fan of mushrooms and really don’t know much about shitakes, but if they taste like skunky earwax, this powder’s spot-on.

Soy sauce packet.

This is pretty decent soy sauce.

Finished (click image to enlarge). As usual, I’m not really stoked on these noodles. While they are great as far as texture and chewing go, they have this strange aftertaste that reminds me slightly of what a freshly opened jar of vitamins has (kind of funny since they purport their rich vitamin content). The broth is mushroom flavored for sure. I must admit I expected it to taste worse than it does, what with the taste of the powder. Long story short, if you have to eat something that says healthy and you like mushrooms and all things earthy, languishing in health food stores and the like, I would say this is for you. It surprises me how much people really like this stuff; I guess my palate is a bit different. In any case, the more varieties of instant noodles, the better! I however can’t finish it I dislike it so much. 1.5 out of 5.0 stars. UPC bar code 8850987139161 – get it here.

GreeNoodle promo video

This guy’s been doing ramen reviews from time to time on YouTube and so I thought I’d put his up for this one. It’s a different view on this product.

#638: GreeNoodle Yakisoba

Ah, my old adversary – the GreeNoodle! I’m hoping I like this one better than the ones I’ve had in the past – Yakisoba should be tasty; I hope!

Click image to enlarge. Pretty impressive numbers there – low fat, high fiber and protein and quite low in sodium for an instant noodle.

Yep – green noodles. Not that strange of a thing; you can easily find spinach infused pasta. This just looks a little different in a ramen block. Apparently the magical moroheiya makes all these health benefits and the fine green color possible.

Clockwise from top: veggies, liquid seasoning, powder seasoning.

Mounds of flavor awaiting some drained noodles.

Finished (click image to enlarge). Well, it’s green. These moroheiya leaves must be worth it, right? I rmember how much I truly detested the green tea Chlorella noodles I had a while back – gag reflex, engage! So let’s see here… The noodles are of good texture. The flavor is really good with the seasonings – until around chew number four or five when the funky earthy flavor kicks in. Then it’s kind of a gobble quick before more flavor happens. The veggies on the other hand were awesome – especially the corn! Weird. Of all the moroheiya filled GreeNoodle products I’ve tried thus far, this is definitely the best. A bit of sweet and spicy and good veggies despite the funky aftertaste. 3.0 out of 5.0 stars. Generous. UPC barcode 8850987139253 – get it here. If your want to try a free sample of the noodles without seasonings, check it out here.

A GreeNoodle commercial.

GreeNoodle on location in Alameda, California.

Indigestion: Reader’s Digest Article Way Off The Mark

This was found, given to my sister and passed along to me. This is from a Reader’s Digest. I haven’t seen the Lucky Peach yet but boy is this stuff screwed up. I really liked how Nong Shim was just a Californian company – no mention of the fact that it’s Korean.  The Myojo Chukazanmai is a line of noodles by Myojo and has such an array of types (some are even to be served cold) that this broad review makes no sense. I think everyone knows how I feel about the GreeNoodle – try and try again I find them detestable. The Kamfen was the kicker for me though. Which one was reviewed? There’s a ton of varieties… Finally the article’s name kind of peeves me, but at least someone might go ahead and see f people review instant noodles online. The kicker? Not any mentions of anything from Indonesia, Thailand or Vietnam. Shameful!